Justice League Movie Review | Geeks With Forks

So I finally saw Justice League this weekend annnnnnnnnnnnnnnd I didn’t like. I was so close to actually liking the movie and then halfway through WB dropped the ball. They dropped the ball like those idiots that drop things in those infomercials. Besides the wack scene when Steppenwolf steals the Mother Box from the Amazons, the first half of the movie was decent. Not great. Just decent. Even as I type this, I can honestly say that Justice League isn’t a good movie, however, it isn’ta “bad” movie. I understand why some people liked it. There are some things to like. At least it was better than the other DCEU movies before it. Yes, Wonder Woman was over-hyped and not as great as everyone says it is – better than BvS though.

“I was so close to actually liking the movie and then halfway through WB dropped the ball. They dropped the ball like those idiots that drop things in those infomercials.”

 

The crowd at the theater was not happy with the movie either. Even Star Wars: Episode I got a standing ovation when it was over. Someone in the theater tried to start a clap but it died quickly. I heard maybe 5 or 6 people clapping. I believe people were just confused at what they just watched. I heard quite a number of people complain as soon as the credits started rolling. I was one of them. I left the theater feeling…empty. I’m stuck in a paradox and I don’t know how to get out of it.

Crowd reaction at the theater I went to.

Alright, so what did I not like about Justice League? Well…

ALL OF THE EXPOSITION

For the sake of trying to cram a lot into a short movie, we get a LOT of exposition from all of the characters and that really makes the interactions extremely unnatural and less genuine. Instead of learning about the characters organically through context clues and hints, the audience is treated as if we are unintelligent and can’t think for ourselves so we’re s for fed plot points and origin stories through dialogue.

For those who don’t quite understand what exposition is, just imagine showing a small child how to tie a shoe and as you are trying to show them how to tie there shoe, after each step, the child asks, “But why?”. So now you have to stop and explain why the shoestring is white, why you have to tie your shoes, why do we have to wear shoes…do you see where this is going. Justice League is guilty of doing this throughout the whole movie.

THE PLOT – “Lord of the Allsparks”

Sauron comes to Middle Earth for the three Allsparks. He is fought off by the races and gods of earth, somehow. Then the Allsparks are given three races to be protected…wait…I can’t. While typing this, I realized how stupid the plot really is…because…reasons.

Seriously though, the plot in many ways didn’t make any sense. Especially, during the Superman resurrection scene. Up until that point the All…I mean Mother Boxes were the most important things. So what does the Justice League do with the one they have…lose it. They lose it like you lose your wallet on the bus or leave a baby, in a car seat, on the roof of your car and drive away type of losing it. COME ON MAN!!!! Steppenwolf just comes and takes it and they are like…”oh yeah, we forgot that was there.”

 

LOIS LANE MUST DIE!

I have hated Lois’s character since Man of Steel. The relationship has been forced since. There just isn’t any chemistry between the two actors. Lois’s character has been nothing other than a plot device to move the story along. Her biggest moments, in all of the movies, the character has been in, have been nothing but lazy moments that the writers wrote in to force some type of drama.  h much to like other than I thought Superman was awesome up until the end of the fight when Lois Lane shows up. It’s like writers sit down and write these movies like”

Writer 1: So there’s this big fight and…

Writer 2: Superman beats the crap out of everyone and flies away because he’s conflicted.

Writer 3: No, that simply wouldn’t work.

Writer 4: How about, Superman beats up the Justice League and right before he is about to kill Batman, Bruce yells out “MARTHA!”.

Writer 5: Nope. We did that already.

Writer 6: I GOT IT! How about we have Lois show up at the climax of a pivotal scene for no other reason than to have an excuse to end the best part of the movie and force a weak romance that no one cares about.

Writers 1-30: GREAT IDEA!

 

SUPERMAN IS TOO POWERFUL AND WERE THEY SERIOUS WITH THAT RESURRECTION?

I liked Superman in this movie…until the Lois scene. Also, the writers made Superman too strong lessened the threat of Steppanwolf. Also, and excuse my language, but that WACK ASS Superman resurrection. Like, the writer weren’t even trying to be creative with it. Lazy, extremely lazy writing. I can think of several ways they could gone about.

 

BATMAN NO MORE

Although I loathe BvS, I liked Affleck as Batman in it. Justice League made me hate Affleck as Batman and the character Batman. Affleck didn’t seem as Bruce Wayne-ish as he did in BvS and Batman didn’t seem like the comic book Batman. I think Affleck is tired of WB because he phones this performance in.

WONDER WOMAN, IM SORRY

Of all the characters introduced in the DCEU, I feel sorry for Wonder Woman. Gal Gadot is awesome as Wonder Woman but the character stuck in a crappy movie universe. I know one thing she can’t block with those bracelets, a shitty DC movie.

Wonder Woman trying to block the B.S.

THE BIG FLASH THEORY

People will say they liked the Flash and he did have some funny scenes, however, he kept reminding me of Sheldon from Big Bang Theory. For me, he teetered on the line of funny and annoying.

AQUAMAN AKA BROSEIDON AND MERA

 

IN CONCLUSION

Justice League is fun, loud and action-packed, however, it suffers the same fate of the previous DC movies – poor writing, poor editing, and bad CGI.

Justice League is okay…not bad….just okay.

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